A modern take of "Who’s on First"

Posted: January 31, 2007 in Jokes

(Disclaimer: Unfortunately I didn’t write this and can’t credit whoever did, it was sent to me in an email. Whoever the writer is, I bow down before you)

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch,”Who’s on First?” might have turned out something like this: Costello calls to buy a computer from Abbott

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: Thanks. I’m setting up an office in my den and I’m thinkingabout buying a computer.


COSTELLO: No, the name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don’t own a computer. I want to buy one.


COSTELLO: I told you, my name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO: I don’t know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to writeproposals, track
expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended something?


COSTELLO: For my office?


COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let’s just say I’msitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?


COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue “W”.

COSTELLO: I’m going to click your blue “w” if you don’t start with somestraight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOT T: Money.

COSTELLO: That’s right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What’s bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn’t it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? They own it!

(A few days later)

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on “START”…

  1. Big Brother says:

    That is a good one. It just has the essence of the old Abbot and Costello word games. Like the comedian Marc Favreau who died not long ago. His character, Sol, could play with words like jugglers juggling a dozen balls. Too bad there are no comedians like them.

  2. John Bailey says:

    Brilliant! I can just see the two funny guys…

  3. choochoo says:

    Hey, I think I know those guys

  4. bardouble29 says:

    I love it!!! I used to love watching those guys on TV.

  5. Dan says:

    This is hilarious!Did you write this? If so, you’re funny. If not … well … you’re still funny except you didn’t write this. 🙂

  6. Jazz says:

    Dan – I’m funny but I didn’t write this.

  7. Jocelyn says:

    Most excellent post. Did you, um, maybe have a little extra time at work…? Seems like a lot of time and thinking went into this cleverness.

  8. Jazz says:

    Oh no Jocelyn it isn’t mine! Mr Jazz emailed it to me and as things would have it, I was clueless as to what to write, so I took the easy way out. I should edit to reflet that it isn’t mine…

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