My seasonal rant….

Posted: July 19, 2011 in Uncategorized

Montreal.  Winter. -20 degrees, -8,000 with the wind chill. Nasty nasty stuff.

Montreal. Summer. 33 degrees with humidity bordering on swimming through the air. It’s hot. Hot, hot, hot.

In both cases, it’s normal weather for this part of the world (and Minneapolis as I understand it from Pearl – Minneapolis and Montreal are weather twins – fitting, as they alliterate nicely)


So yeah, as you might have guessed,  right now it’s not -20 – we’re talking normal here though there is nothing normal, ever, about sub-zero temperatures. Montreal these days is wiltingly hot.

And when temperatures rise in Montreal what happens?  Radio call in shows host subjects such as: “What do you do to keep cool in this sort of weather?”  and “Is this global warming at work?” And meteorologists are invited to comment on the weather, because people? We’re just too dumb to know it’s hot out. It seems we’re just that stupid that self-evident is simply not clear enough.

Newsflash people! It’s JULY. In MONTREAL. This is just freaking NORMAL!!! Get the hell over it.

Every freaking year it’s the same story. You’d think everyone was just transplanted from the frozen tundra and had never experienced this sort of thing.

You live here! You’ve lived here your entire freaking LIFE!

How can this come as a surprise to you? Does the whole population of the whole damn province have the attention span of a newt?  Was everyone suddenly struck with weather amnesia, that they don’t remember it was really hot two weeks ago, never mind last summer?

And of course, come the first cold snap of winter, it’ll be the same damn thing. “Cold? It’s never been cold before, has it?”

Whine whine whine whine.  I’ll admit that I whine copiously in winter. But you can’t have it both ways, you can either whine over winter or summer. When I take over the world, the first thing I’ll do is institute the death penalty (or at least the “poke them with sharp sticks” penalty) for anyone who whines about both. It annoys me to no end, it does.

And with that, I leave you to go revel in the wilting heat.


  1. Gnightgirl says:

    Hallelujah! I’m with you, I always say that we midwesterners bitch about winter as if we’ve never experienced it before. Winter bitchers irritate me more as many of them rarely dress for it–wear a mini-skirt and boots in subzero weather, don’t expect to stay warm, honey.

    I wonder how people in constantly hot climates fare, mentally. Are there heat advisories every single day near the equator, because those that live there are shocked and unprepared high temps?

  2. choochoo says:

    we’re having a wet summer. I’m kinda liking it, really.

  3. Toronto is HOT! They called for thunderstorms all day yesterday and it was LIES!! No storms, just more humidity!

    We are escaping lakeside for a few days, just to try and enjoy the weather, instead of fight it!

  4. mrwriteon says:

    What’s it like to have a warm day? I do not remember by this point in our Jul-Tober.

  5. VioletSky says:

    I love it when people phone in, or post to the weather channel (or whatever) that they deal with it by going to the pool, and the host reacts as if this is such a novel way of beating the heat.
    I was so looking forward to those t-storms yesterday!

  6. lime says:

    i dunno at least the weather gives variety for reporting. in trinidad, there were 2 seasons, rainy and dry. so for all intents and purposes there were two different things they could say for the weather report….for 365 days a year.

  7. Rachel says:

    Im totally with you on the pick one to whine about, but not both sentiment. Gee whiz. I hear it every fucking day at work. “Its so hot!” “Its too cold” GAH!

  8. geogypsy says:

    And today at the Grand Canyon’s North Rim, it was just right.

  9. geewits says:

    I should have visited here before I posted on my blog, but at least I included a visual aid stating that this was record type stuff and not normal. Also, in my defense, I don’t think I ever complain about winter. Not the temps anyway, just the super dry air and static shocks. And having to constantly clean the humidifiers. Maybe I won’t mind those things this winter. Oh, hell, who am I kidding? I freaking hate static shocks.

  10. I hear you! I’m in Vegas and it’s killer hot. But as they say “it’s a dry heat” … all that means is that it feels more llike a blow dryer than a steam room … still HOT!

  11. Guillaume says:

    Montreal is a city where the temperature is excessive, whether it is summer or winter. You gotta live with it and learn to appreciate it. I had the nicest times there during both seasons. I guess people’s acceptance of a temperature is circumstantial: I enjoy a heatwave when I am lazy at home, being to dip in a pool or read, or drink lemonade/cold beer/what have you, I enjoy it less when I have to go to work. I enjoyed cold winter days watching movies, drinking beer or eating big hearty dinners (fondues, tourtière, sausages from William Walters).

  12. Suldog says:

    Huh. I’m surprised I didn’t comment on this earlier. Oh, well. Perhaps God stayed my hand from clicking through to here until it was FREAKING 101 DEGREES HERE IN BOSTON.

    (I think that translates to about 33 Canadian.)

    In any case, I know exactly what you mean. People around here act as though they’ve never seen a damn snowstorm, in winter, and have never felt the heat before, in summer. Dopes.

  13. Jocelyn says:

    So do you think it’ll be hot there next July, too?

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