Muthafucka*

Posted: July 7, 2012 in Uncategorized

So far this summer at the cottage has been all about war.

All out war with those damn rodents. Don’t know how the squirrels are getting in, but they are most definitely getting in. In the past couple of months I’ve had to kill three, and another of the evil little bastards was taunting me just a couple of weeks ago…

Taunting me! Me who has no problem wringing their scrawny little necks. They don’t seem to realize that I WILL win.

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(I have my friend Alain to thank for this “book” he left at the cottage last week)

And today, as I went to fill the hummer feeders:

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The latest in a long line of insults.

Mutha fucka has been eating the feeder! Hope the plastic killed him.

Listen up jerkoffs, I might have lost this battle, but never ever doubt that I will win the war…

At least the hummers don’t seem to mind their new and “improved” feeder.

* Sorry for the lack of formatting, it was typed on the iPad. I hate that I can’t seem to center the pics.

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Comments
  1. mrwriteon says:

    I’ll send Max up there. He’d know how to handle them. Max just loooooooooooooves chasing squirrels.

  2. pinklea says:

    You know a squirrel is just a rat with good PR, right? (And not those cute little domestic rats that are so intelligent and make such good pets, either.)

  3. geogypsy2u says:

    Dang, they are destructive little muthers.

    • Jazz says:

      They are. And they’re assholes. When they get in they tend to poop on the table and counters. Nowhere else. They do it to spite me.

  4. Jocelyn says:

    All too often I have this moment with you: when you make me love you even more than I already did. Killing squirrels? Can you please come here and do the same? Plus, one harassing chipmunk?

    Squirrels are EVIL and INSANE and HAVE NO BOUNDARIES. Of those three, the last offends me the most.

  5. lime says:

    you’d get along well with mr. lime. he has a real vendetta against the critters.

  6. geewits says:

    You know, I had never heard of home-invading squirrels before you. Maybe your land has some sort of plant or seeds that is like squirrel PCP. Or maybe suburb squirrels are just more timid? You need to get some feral cats from a farmer to live there. They would be well fed and your problems would be over.

    • Jazz says:

      Problem is that the house sits on a rock. There isn’t a proper “box” cellar. So they squeeze in through cracks and such I suppose. Though I did find something that looks like a hole this weekend. Which I plugged up. Fingers crossed.

  7. Let’s see. You hate squirrels, as does the love of my life, who tried to prove it from our tower with an air pellet gun, and this is a Blue neighborhood. And Mrwriteon loves you. And you’ve got a comment from Jocelyn, who is some sort of fabulous. I guess I’m going to have to keep reading.

  8. Suldog says:

    Well, normally I’m a big defender of squirrels, but I suppose if they’re pooping on your table…

    Get cats. You’ll be entertained all day by chase scenes.

  9. Jazz says:

    I had cats. They hid. They were idiot cats.

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